This is such a dramatic intro.
Apparently that is their new thing.
Last time I checked. . . this isn't that big of a deal.
They are treating it like George Lucas would a battle between a Sith Lord and a Jedi Master.
Yes, I took it there.
Oh Ryan, I love you and your tie clips, and the fact that you are going to say "Flo Rida" a million times tonight.
Ew, I will not say hi to Randy and his ugly shirt.
Ryan and I are of one mind tonight. He called Simon Darth Vader. Apparently we both love Star Wars.
Oh my goodness. I love Frankie Avalon. This is the best thing that has ever happened on American Idol. I want to go watch him on a cruise ship. . . and I mean that in the very best way possible. Really. I want to do that.
But if we could not sing songs from 2002. . . that would be awesome. Especially songs entitled "Can't get you out of my head".
How did we go from amazing classic songs like "Venus" to this?
Is this not pre-recorded this week? Because it sounds horrible.
Magic show for the Ford music video? Wow, they don't do this every year. . .
So guess who has been inspired to have a new photo shoot with herself?
Tomorrow is the beginning of spring break. This will be happening.
I like Kris's shirt. That inspires me to make shirts. Maybe I'll do that over spring break too. So many options.
Adam? Safe? I'm shocked! Just kidding. He should probably win the whole thing.
KIRSSSSS!!!! SAFFFFFEEEEEEEEEEE. Yes.
Anoop though. .. bottom three. I'm not actually surprised. He sang "True Colors", you can't not be in the bottom three.
2nd time Ryan has said Flo Rida.
3rd time Ryan has said Flo Rida.
This is kind of a horrible song. Not really a family song.
Also. . . if these dancers could be bigger hooers, that would also make it more family friendly.
4th time Ryan has said Flo Rida
Did they just bleep him out? Did Flo Rida just swear? On American Idol? Oh, no, he is just mentioning things he isn't supposed to. No Flo Rida, they will not plug your live streaming concert. This is American Idol.
And Flo, please don't complain about your struggles. You have a million bajillion dollars.
The only African American that can complain about struggles is Obama, because he grew up in Hawaii.
5th time Ryan has said Flo Rida (maybe the last?)
Danny is going home! Oh wait. . . that was just a wonderful dream. He is safe.
Mole, I mean, Matt. . is safe. Ryan tried to trick him, but he wouldn't have it.
Scott's hair is looking especially fluffy this evening. Chair time.
I'm very happy that Lil' is in the bottom three. She needs to be there. I would actually be okay with her going home. But I already know who is going home. Because someone on Facebook or Twitter always tells me. It's getting annoying.
Kellie Pickler? I really. . . don't like country music. . .
This isn't sounding good. At all. Oh my goodness. . . she needs to stop playing in my ears.
Ew, Simon, stop looking at Kellie's boobies. That is really uncomfortable.
Okay, now stop looking at her butt. Do you not realize that a large majority of America is watching you?
What is going on with her face? Did she have work done? She looks like she is in her 40's. . . last time I checked she was in her. . 20's? Right?
Maybe she is going for the Faith Hill look. You know. . .washed up country star. . .ohhhhhhhhh, did I just say that out loud? I take it back. I didn't mean it.
Lil' needs to go. And not back to the couches.
Anoop and Scott. I want to pretend that I'm in suspense. . but I already know.
Aw, Scott is so nice.
Ahahaha, Maddy just said, "it's always so awkward when the blind person has to go home".
Are they all crying? He isn't dying. He is just blind. He is more accomplished that most people who can see.
Maddy is on a roll. I don't think I can repeat what she just said. It is just hitting below the belt.
Okay fine, she said, "is he deaf too?"
Is this really the closest they've come to using the save? They didn't even pretend to deliberate this much for Alexis.
Well, goodbye Scott, you are "one classy gentleman".